The letter has come through, for us to store our frozen embryos for another year. I knew it was coming. It arrived just before I attended Fertility Fest.  Now, I know how lucky we are to have had successful treatment and a beautiful baby boy, plus the added bonus that we have ‘frosties’ as my pal calls them.

frozen

But, it still is an added ‘thing to have to consider’ when you’ve been through treatment. What we do next, what happens to our embryos if we don’t use them.  A part of me is hoping we will just fall pregnant naturally, but I know how unlikely that is. Another part of me thinks just go and have a frozen transfer, but I know we’re not ready.. then there’s the part of me that is anxious.

Anxious about it not working.

I just called the clinic to ask a few questions.. we have 3 ‘frosties’ and there’s a 5/6 week waiting list for a consultation to talk through our options for a frozen embryo transfer. So do I book us in now? In my head, I’ve got a timeline as I’m 40 next year, even though my embryos will be a 36 year old me. I had a chat with hubby about if we thought about treatment after my birthday this year, it would mean in an ideal world, we could have a baby before my next birthday. Is it really possible to have such a timeline? That in itself seems hard to get my head around. But you will know if you’ve been on fertility journey, it’s all dates and timings.. rather than the surprises of a natural route to parenthood.

I spoke with a fertility nurse the other day, at a clinic I was visiting as part of my current tour of UK clinics with my lovely sponsor Access Fertility. She said to me that it was likely I’d get pregnant however I thought we had 6… we have 3..

I find myself filled with worry all of a sudden that our chances of a second child might not be as likely as I’d though, yet at the same time feeling guilty as I know how many of you are still struggling to even start your family.

I truly feel this journey is ongoing, regarding your struggle. I know I’ve touched on it before and it’s so important for us to share our experiences to learn how we can cope better. I’d love to hear from you if you’ve had a frozen cycle and how you felt about it. If you’re happy to share email me natalie@thefertilitypodcast.com

xx